The “holy crap, there IS another team playing worse than us” edition.
Adams – stop the Hassanity. Shot 50% from the floor, grabbed two boards. A thing of beauty. Sure to be on SportsCentre. Sorry those without TSN2 missed this.
Bargnani – El Fuego. Only thing better at the ACC tonight was the prime rib sandwich. Passable D on Yao (!) and knocking down shots like Barkley does bottles of Patron.
Bosh – looked like he was actually having fun again. Nice that he was able to grab a lot of rest in the fourth to rest up for Sunday. Admittedly, I thought he would get scorched tonight, but I was completely wrong.
Calderon – admit it. You saw him clutch his hammy and you reached for the remote. Not sure what happened to tweak it upon his return, but maybe his locker is close to HO’s and they had paused the Wii during shootaround and Jose didn’t want to wait until the end of the game to finish owning HO’s ass in Wii Tennis.
Graham – nice game. In an odd way, he kind of seemed a bit surprised that things were coming to him fairly easily tonight. Played 25 min but probably could have been used a bit more.
Humphries – run free, young fella. Incredibly only played 3 more minutes than Hassan. Really. He is as underused as ice skates in Mexico.
Jawai – Seemingly a poll was taken in the locker room and, from that, we found out what Nathan’s favourite candy is.
Kapono – his early effort was as horrible as biting into a burrito and seeing half a mouse staring back at you after you swallow. Picked it up a bit in the second half but could have used the night off.
Moon – mobile and remembering he can play above the rim. Still needs to look for his teammates more. He also should have taken it to TMAC all night and dropped 50 on the mule.
O’Neal – hurt. How do you know? We won handily and played like a team.
Parker – hey, Anthony…..that red mark on your ears? Ron Artest scorching your ass like hemorrhoids on a pregnant chick. Least now we know why you keep your hair shaved so short….so we don’t have to see it flop in the breeze of the ball going over your head.
Solomon – you have to think Devlin is eating some crow. Will did a good job on the floor and actually passed to some teammates. Of course, it’s a new month and still early, and he has now used up his one-good-game-a-month quota. See ya in February.
Ukic – horseface killah had to be reminded that the guys wearing white actually play on his team, but once he was, he did fine. Nifty pass to Kris and the eerie ability to be a rare commodity in that a haircut actually helps the aerodynamic structure of his head, allowing him to be almost stealthlike when needed.
Voskuhl – took on Yao like a warrior. Still don’t think he should be playing ahead of Kris, but no complaints tonight. That whole conversation about why he wears 77 by Jack and Matt was quite the hoot, though. You could almost hear the lightbulb click “on” over Jack’s head. Hope we see Jake take on Dwight at some point on Sunday.
Driving The Bus: Andrea Bargnani
Under The Bus: Jason Kapono
Game Theme: Was he ready?Follow @raptorsrepublic