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The “we were right there..if only we were 100%” edition

Banks – well, when most of our squad doesn’t feel 100%, at least we have Marcus to fall back on. Of course, that’s like bringing a budgie to a cock fight.

Bargnani – he had himself a Roko-esque shooting night. He virtually slept through the first half and they finally found some spicy food to wave under his nose to snap him out of it. On a night when Marion was doing his imitation of a SI Swimsuit Model applicant, we needed Big Bargs, not meek bargs.

Bosh – and on the opposite end of the timeline we have RuPaul. CB4 came out like a house on fire, driving, rebounding, jump shooting, eating beef jerky……then he decided to check his Twitter at halftime and spent most of the second half wondering how to re-tweet. Did post another double double and fought his way back to double digit appearances at the line. Still, some action in the second half would have been, you know, welcome.

Calderon – ugly ugly game. Not having a whiner as a coach ugly, but ugly. If some of your dreams come true and BC looks to find a buyer for JC this offseason, his play of late is doing nothing for his value. The free-flowing offense we are looking to run does not fit his style. He has turned into a half court, run a play PG.

Graham – came back and absolutely took the game over early. It was like watching a housefly trying to get back outside through a sunny window. Joey was all over the place and hitting shots. Unfortunately, as what seems to happen to him frequently, he sits back down and comes back in the game looking like someone got to him with a swatter.

Humphries – APB has been issued.

Kapono – the gunslinger in a gun shooting state. Most of his shots were blank tonight, though. Some were downright horrendous, to be honest.

Marion – looked like he had just downed a 2L milk and hopped on the Drop Zone. Flu like symptoms, but at least he tried to play. Admittedly it would have been cool to see him heave on court, especially if it hit Dirk, but I digress.

O’Bryant – may have been hit with clipboard shrapnel. News at 11.

Parker – 13pts 9 brds 7 assts. His outside shooting was working for him and he fell victim to 2 suspect calls. Nice to see some of his passes were finding their mark, which is more than can be said for Jose.

Ukic – the lesser of 2 evils, but considering what passes as our PG position these days, that isn’t saying much. Played well tonight, did his best to stick to his defender and kept his shots under control. See? I can be nice. I can lie too.

Voskuhl – the leagues best PF/min average is still alive at 1!!! Wonder if this can last for 10 years too?

Driving The Bus:   Chris Bosh

Under The Bus:    Jose Calderon

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