The “experimental phase” edition:

Alabi: want to know why there was no lightning storm today as predicted?  Casey had his trainers in the back pulling in all electrical charges in order to shock Solo to life. It worked. The city shook as if Mayor Ford had jumped off his couch when Solomon saw minutes in the first half and, wait for it, he deserved to come back! 24 minutes in all, going 4 of 9, and putting up 8 points, 9 rebounds with 4 of those offensive.

Anderson: after getting picked up for the season he came out and showed what an average night for him is. He was a great cheerleader from the bench, but in 25 minutes of burn he didn’t really rise above his teammates to say thank you for the support.

Davis: I’m ecstatic to hear he knows he needs to keep at it in the summer and come back a hell of lot better (read: bigger) next season. He had a monster block in this game that made me cross my legs just witnessing it, but the rest of his night featured the Edward Special: blend into the background and look like you’d rather be watching Desperate Housewives.

DeRozan: he has verbalized the fact that he knows he needs to step up and statistically he has….but is that more a result of he is basically the only go-to guy left standing? Don’t get me wrong, he played well tonight and certainly filled the bucket, but his on-court persona doesn’t befit a leader, an assistant or a closer.

Forbes: back to 20+ minutes, but uggggghhhhhhhh-ly.  I’ve seen sexier performances put on at 50+ night at For Your Eyes Only.  Nothing clicked for Gary…including the seatbelt to keep him attached to the bench, apparently.

Gray: wow. Back in high school, during gym class one day, this oaf of a guy literally missed punting a football 3 times straight. Not a held ball, not one on a tee, one literally dropped from his own hands 2 feet to his foot. 3 times. If that was Aaron Gray, it would have been 4 times after a night like this.

A. Johnson: Mr. Chuckles posted an 8 and 8 tonight and he played with a bit more pep in his step. Maybe the Canadian dosage in his Midol is stronger than the US version? He must be pretty stoked that the end is near…his season has been so up and down it’s sponsored by American Standard.

J. Johnson: Jimmy Jams made a re-appearance tonight.  A fierce dunk in the first half that will undoubtedly be shown on TSN 14 times an hour to boost their Canadian content, he made his way to the line, he passed out 5 dimes, he howled at the moon and he almost kissed Amir. Quite the Monday night for a guy who is more smug than the entire male cast of Jersey Shore.

Uzoh: if there was a magnet on the ball and the opposite magnet in the bottom of the net, he would have the ball land on the score clock. Just a horrible shooting night, but 10 rebounds?? Is that right?? We haven’t seen rebounding prowess like that from the PG position since Darrell Walker had hair!

Driving the bus: DeMar DeRozan

Under the bus: Aaron Gray

Theme of the Game:

  • Pbjake

    Typical roll call filled with all those obscure references I don’t understand… I LOVE IT.
    gonna miss these in the offseason.

  • DieHardAlabiFan

    Good to see Solo getting some burn! I told you all that all he needed was some minutes, 8 points, 9 rebounds, 1 blocked shot, and 1 steal, all while playing with a big smile on his face, the guy is a beast! He was driving the bus tonight in my books! #SolomonAlaBEAST.

    • mountio

      big time!! Give me one good reason he shouldnt play 30 mins plus the rest of the year??

      • DieHardAlabiFan

        There is only one reason: He could greatly disrupt the tanking effort by causing us to win games, but if he plays like the player we all know he can be, does a high draft pick even matter? JV and AlaBEAST, twin towers.

    • Nilanka15

      Yeah, he surprisingly impressed last night.  I didn’t realize just how big this dude is.  With a little polish, he could be a serviceable backup big.  But then again, there wasn’t a single player on the Hawks roster who could pass as a legit centre.

      He’s got a team option for next season at $890,000.  Wonder if Colangelo picks it up.

      • mountio

        Doesnt that raise the bigger question – wtf have we been doing not giving this guy some run to at least figure out what hes got? We are trying to lose games anyways .. ?? This is beyond me .. Aaron Grey does us know good at this point. Let Amir rest, give Ed lots of run and same for Alabi ..

        • Nilanka15

          Can’t help but agree.

        • RaptorFan

          i agree as well!  makes no sense

  • hateslosing

    Soloman Alabi > Dwight Howard and Andrew Bynum… I think so.

    • voy

      Han Solo-man Alabi.

  • pran

    why isn’t gary forbes under the bus? I honestly believe he single handedly fucked up that game for us with his play at point, uzoh was doing pretty well. 

    Nice to see solo get some run….

  • DC

    How the hell is SOLO not driving the bus? Idc if he didn’t score the most points but hell he should be  driving the bus just because he got in the first half. And almost had a double double WTF definanatly driving the bus tonight with hydralics, spinners, and tinted windows with a banging ass system. Cmon ACC where were those MVP chants at?? 
    Solo Yolo

  • Ion66

    Caught part of the 1st half on the radio in the car tonight but that’s it. I had to read Uzoh’s stat line several times to see if I was reading it right. I dont remember ever seeing 10 rebounds out of a PG before. Rough shooting night though. What did he do….toss it off the backboard and go get it? How did his game look on TV? Just curious.

  • Bendit

    For the first time I feel as if there was a coordinated effort sanctioned by Casey to start the tank. They looked around and noticed what the other basement lodgers were doing. 

    • BCStefanskiCaseyGots2Go!!!

      BC probably told Casey to play Alabi alot of minutes as so the Raptors will most likely lose while Dentmon’s 10 day expired & he was let go- no back up pg, BC’s trying to stick it to the guys for winning games…smdhUzoh & Anderson should have played 35 minutes….this is a young team isn’t?Watch the Raptors fall in the Lottery draw anyways..BC’s bad karma…..lol

      • BCStefanskiCaseyGots2Go!!!

        BC probably told Casey to play Alabi alot of minutes as so the Raptors will most likely lose while Dentmon’s 10 day expired & he was let go- no back up pg, BC’s trying to stick it to the guys for winning games…smdhUzoh & Anderson should have played 35 minutes….this is a young team isn’t?Watch the Raptors fall in the Lottery draw anyways..BC’s bad karma…..lol

        • Dwane Casey

           You know Anderson is 29, right?

          • BCStefanskiCaseyGots2Go!!!

            29 is old in the NBA and/or life?

            Still jocking me for responses- so heavy on your mind all the time.lmfao

    • Nilanka15

      Too little too late, I’m afraid.

      • Bendit

        You are probably right…sigh.

  • BCStefanskiCaseyGots2Go!!!

    im gay

  • Paran Srikantha

    jo

    • Lorenzo

       Yo!

  • ShermanTank

    That’s more like it boys! Although it’s too bad a late push from LeBron and the Heat barely beat the Nets, a loss is always good to see. 0.5 games behind Cleveland for that 5th spot, they take on the Pistons tomorrow who are also in the hunt, but would rather see the Cavs win that one. The Tank is now rolling onto South Beach. #TankNation.