If his mind is made up - and when even Ferguson accepts there is little chance of reconciliation, so should we - the most sensible option would be Chelsea.
They pay big money, they win titles, they would suit his style, and in London he may find the anonymity he must crave after a traumatic year in the spotlight.
The perception is that the capital represents bright lights, big city and, as the song says, will go to my baby's head.
In modern times, this has been pretty much based on the sorry downfall of one player, Paul Gascoigne, who is said to have faltered by choosing to sign for Tottenham Hotspur ahead of Manchester United.
There is one flaw in this theory, which is that Gascoigne was plainly a damaged individual and proved this at any number of locations thereafter, including Rome, Newcastle, Liverpool, Burnley, Kettering and Lanzhou in China, near the Gobi desert.
The problem was the man, not the conurbation. If what Rooney desires is to escape from the glare - although his people have found a funny way of showing it this week - London would be a safer bet than even Madrid, Milan or Barcelona.