The “this game brought to you by Dr Martens” edition:

Barbosa: a spark? He’s supposed to provide a spark?  Listen, if he was giving his brother’s car a boost and he intentionally touched the jumpers together, rather than get sparks you would see a puff of smoke and some dripping water with the sound of a fizzle.

Bargnani: finally showing signs of prolonged fatigue, he took a step back….and only scored 22 points. Just as with the rest of his teammates, you could tell he was sucking in air pretty good, but unlike his teammates he was more than just a flash of his normal self.

Butler: if I had to describe his game (not just this one…every one) to a non-basketball fan, I’d say it would be as important to a successful victory as taking a wet paper towel to Niagara Falls, getting on the Maid of The Mist and, just as the boat got close to the falls, you tried to dry the deck with said paper towel. A venture full of frustration.

Calderon: how did the Raptors do tonight? If I told you Jose had 4 turnovers all of them unforced…..yeah, there you go. Guess there was less incentive facing Wall than there was Rubio.

Carter: 50% from the floor, 66% from 3, 8pts, 6asts…..he was a machine compared to the rest of the second unit tonight. In a way he reminds me of a discount Nash. He comes in, is all business and goes about making things happen.

Davis: Dad is in the crowd and you still can’t hit the hoop from 1.5 feet out. Don’t let the stat line fool you. You want to get a snapshot of his night? Watch the final minute where he started to press as the Wizards were bringing the ball up and, as he went to reach in, instead of really trying for the steal, he just motioned with his hand as if to say “ahhh, forget it” and backed off.  Sure, we were done and no chance of a come back, but that was ugly to see.

DeRozan: listless. boring. less desire to attack the hole than a doctor at a herpes clinic.  Sure, you can say your head is busy trying to learn defensive schemes and a new system, but when you and your team is getting your ass handed to you by a team that has yet to win a game, you might want to choose to remember what got you noticed and use it to your teams advantage. Just a thought.

Forbes: he is just proving that his career will be the equivalent of a Samuel Dalembert line of basketball shoes: inconsequential.

A. Johnson: he gave us 10 rebounds and one of the most blatant elbows to an opponent that went uncalled this season. If you get murdered under the hoop and get no call, you might as well elbow someone and make it look natural. Great stuff.

J.Johnson: so, you have spent hours, maybe days, working on a document for school. Proud of it, you decide it’s good to go, so you print it off. You get halfway through and you notice the ink is running out and you can barely make out what it says on your $0.50/sheet paper. You’ve been there, right? Your head falls back, you let out an expletive and you feel your fist clench. You’ve been JJ’d.

Driving the bus: Andrea Bargnani

Under the bus: Rasual Butler

Theme of the Game:

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