Toronto Raptors Roll Call vs Mavericks Dec 28

The “inspired” edition.

The “inspired” edition:

Alabi: he was as likely to enter this game as I am the Playboy Mansion.

Barbosa: if you believe the talking heads, he is being held together by spit, string, and some Juicy Fruit. He still brought his B game and that was enough to bridge any gap left by the rest of the St. Elsewhere staff.

Bargnani: probably the best game he has ever played against Dirk.

Bayless: looked high strung for most of the game and then his ankle decided it didn’t want to play with the cool kids anymore. His shots weren’t falling and he suffered from Jose-itis in that the drive was there for him all night, but he didn’t want to seem to take it.

Calderon: decided if all the big boys were sitting, damn it, he was too.

Davis: ladies and gentlemen, your future. There were times tonight where I was flashing back to the Vince and TMac days and remembering what it felt like to really be excited about our future. Ed’s game tonight and seeing how loose he was made me want to break out the dinosaur logo.

DeRozan: another nice game but man when he gets exposed on defence, he may as well wear a trenchcoat. He should come with his own “Doh Doh Doh” sound effect to be played as guys blow by him.

Dorsey: Little Dwight with another solid game. Not that Tyson Chandler exactly threw offence Joey’s way (Chandler attempted 1 FG in 26minutes) but Joey did a nice job in keeping the bigs at bay.

Dupree: Per Diem.

Evans: send this man a Wii and get him back in shape.

Johnson: the Coles Notes version of this game. Playing hurt, he turned in 42 minutes of simply inspired play. Hard nosed off the ball, attacking on both ends of the floor, playing with smarts. You simply couldn’t have asked for a better game from a wounded soldier.

Kleiza: played very well until the mid third when he Keon Clark’d and pulled an idiotic move and got himself T’d up twice and ejected, bringing us down to 2 NBA players, a few scrubs and Alex English getting fitted for tearaways.

Stojakovic: you suck.

Weems: A few days away from mastering playing Yao as a PG in 2k11.

Wright: he took a heck of a charge late in the game that pretty much cemented the W for us. He has completely come out of nowhere this season and, once again I have to say, is almost demanding more time from Jay. Jay has given the wrong answer a few times, but time to change your tune.

Driving The Bus: Amir Johnson

Under The Bus: Linas Kleiza

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