Roll Call – Apr 13 vs Wizards

The “payback’s a bitch” edition

Banks – dead weight.

Bargnani – faker.

Bosh – absolute bonehead play late fourth in not hustling to the ball and letting Dixon blow by you, steal it, and score what could have been the dagger. To make up for it, he did what franchise players do: win the game. Hit a wide open 3, sending the paying customers home disgruntled and making that flight to Chicago all that more enjoyable. 25/15, a smile, and a whole bunch of glaring into the eyes of the doubters.

Calderon – in a just world, he would have put up another double double today. I actually found myself pulling for the matador, thinking it would be a great way for him to close out a dismal year for him. He fell well short, but did show that his greatest value to us is a distributor and only when he takes the time to look for the best possible option as opposed to just one guy continually throughout the game.

Douby – wow…lets hope this game isn’t indicative of a guy who signs a deal and decides to rest on his (small) laurels. Zero points and only 2 assists in 9 minutes? Pathetic.

Graham – nice night. Took some smart shots, no posing for the camera, and looked like he was actually a focal point in some plays run by Triano. Has to be a nice confidence boost at the end of the season.

Humphries –          

Kapono – his season kind of reminds me of that high school kid that is just barely cool enough to sit at your table in the cafeteria. One day he comes in and wows you with some Playboys, the next day he brings in tuna. Today, JKap decided to bring in tuna AND asparagus.

Marion – if you translated his first quarter into female form, you’d have pregnancy-era Halle Berry from the chest up. Nearly achieving a double double in the first frame, he was playing out of his mind. Peppered throughout  the rest of the game was some pretty good defense. Don’t know if he was pulling it out of his ass to try and burn away the memories of the last few games, but add in a 25/15 and I’d say he did done good.

Mensah-Bonsu – surprisingly no blocks, but some nice board clean-up. Still a horrible shooting performance and as Jack pointed out, he is very easily stripped as he drives to the hoop. Maybe he’s a Bosh fan.

O’Bryant – still a fan, but his fouling is driving me bananas and no way a guy of his length plays 20 minutes and gets only one board. I’ll give him a nicely timed block, but if I had arms like a tarantula, I would be Inspector Gadgeting every ball that was even close to me.

Parker – not much to say here. His game is like getting socks at Christmas. Nice and can be put to good use, but you’d rather have NBA 2k9.

Ukic – as bad as Douby was, Roko was worse. Don’t worry little piggies, daddy is coming home soon. If he enters camp next year with little improvement, he needs to be cut. Think about it: he has had a year of on the job training and if you heard his name in the starting lineup, you’d probably get out of your seat and walk out.

Voskuhl – at least he got on the floor. 4 minutes, 2 turnovers, 1 foul. Last seen heading to the White House to see if Obama can give him a pardon for his sins.

Driving The Bus:   Chris Bosh

Under The Bus:    Jason Kapono

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