Toronto vs. Washington, 7:00pm

Gilbert. Caron. Antawn. That’s a formidable three, right up there with those guys in Boston (Powe, Posey, and Scalabrine). So when Gibby went down, Washington was supposed to drop faster than an Israeli hand-glider over Gaza. So what the hell are they doing a mere .5 games behind us in the conference standings? Well, Caron…

Gilbert. Caron. Antawn. That’s a formidable three, right up there with those guys in Boston (Powe, Posey, and Scalabrine).

So when Gibby went down, Washington was supposed to drop faster than an Israeli hand-glider over Gaza. So what the hell are they doing a mere .5 games behind us in the conference standings?

Well, Caron and Antawn have been playing out of their mind, both averaging over 20ppg and carrying a team that could not walk on its own. They went from the Big Three to the One-Two Punch. Third in Wizards scoring? Brendan Haywood, at 10ppg. Seems all it took was Etan Thomas needing open-heart surgery to give Haywood the confidence to play like a  seven-footer instead of like Kirk Cameron, clanging bricks off the Seaver’s garage-rim

Some games, the Wiz are hard to watch. They lost to Jersey, for cripe’s sake. But then they beat Cleveland, Portland, us (grr), and Dallas TWICE on their home court. So they’re kinda like the Raptors*, up one, down one, hot a game, frigid the next.

 *Hopefully, how we USED to be. 

This is a big home-and-home series for both teams, as a sweep either way gives the winner a real shot, both psychologically and in the standings. A split would keep us ahead in the East for the time being, but I think we all know we’re a better team and should take two (Andre Blatche? Come on.) But I’m not sure the Wizards know that. And until they get that memo, they’ll come out looking for blood, hoping to take the all-important first game in the “…Can You Hear Me Now?” Center. 

Personally, I hope the Wizards contract some sort of non-lethal stomach virus that causes them to forfeit both games.  We might be ‘better’ than them, but we don’t match up well. Jamison and Butler are just the type of strong, slashing, active forwards that we have trouble defending. Andrea’s still not there yet. Jamario’s on auto-bite. Carlos and AP are both undersized. Bosh can stay on one of them, but he’s not an excellent one-on-one defender (sorry to all those that think Bosh is perfection in a half-giraffe, half-human body).  Then they’ve got these little chuckers, like Nick Young and Roger Mason, Antionio Daniels and DeShawn Stevenson, and if you remember it was Roger and DeShawn who combined for 26 points and won the game for them when we met back in December. Can’t let them get hot, oh no no no.

If we have any advantage since our last showdown December 1, it’s that Bosh has returned to his beastly form and we are playing much better team basketball. With three days off there’s no excuse for heavy legs or lack of energy. Maybe playing the Wiz will help The Kapono Situation get spicy – that last game was also one of the best efforts from him this season, as he dropped 23 points (I don’t think he’s combined for 23 points since…hold while I check………okay, I was way off, but in the entire month of January he’s only managed a dismal 44 points, or 4ppg.).

What’s interesting is that they don’t shoot well, they don’t pass well, they don’t do anything offensively particularly well. But they rebound, block shots, and get steals – which means (to me) that we need to clamp down defensively and make them work hard at both ends of the court.

Sorry, no Girl Talk today. Work is craptastic and I’m risking several breaches of contract by even sneaking this rush post.*

*Who ever said I wasn’t a gangsta?  

P.S. Damon’s out of Memphis! Hooray Hooray! I will begin the woo-fest by offering Damon a night with my sister (second-base ONLY!), three ounces of Northern Lights, and all of my Marvel Comic Book Cards in exchange for his services for the remainder of the season.  

What’s your offer?